As always, I searched for you despite
The distracting crowd of others gone
Desperate for just a glimpse in the throng
Above the heart-crushing mob
My hollowness behind a façade
Of going about my ordinary life
But my longing remains a knife
I hide behind all the day
But when the light gives way to gray
I submerge in the slumbering hope
In my subconscious relief, grope
Wondering why, always why
Do you know I cry
Every night whether I see you
Fall in your arms and believe you
When you say you still love me
Or times when you are no where I see
When I wake, my face wet
With tears, unable to forget?
I’m starting to think I never will
The silence from you still
Batters me in the truthful dark
My memory of you leaves a mark
Do you ever dream of me, I wonder
When we meet in our slumber?
Are you really there somehow?
Or do I cross your mind at all now?
Sometimes your face interrupts the dawn
Just a glimpse and then you’re gone
I know it’s me who hides you in the light
But I’ll search for you in my dreams tonight.—Christina Knowles (2015)
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